Monday, January 30, 2012

Saw 'The Grey' last night, phenomenal movie that was extremely emotionally draining. Has given me a character idea, based roughly on Liam Neeson's character, and has me really chomping at the bit for another MMO. This poem stuck with me from it, definitely a worthwhile poem even if it was made up by the movie.


Once more into the fray.
Into the last good fight I'll ever know.
Live and die on this day.
Live and die on this day.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Content and its generation

So I have about a 1000 incomplete thoughts racing around at the moment and I just can't quite pin down a solid one to write about. I suppose a lot of that stems from never really sitting down and establishing what exactly this blog is supposed to be focused on. Maybe it'll work out being just a blog where I spew out any ideas I might have, then again my readership seems to be primarily based out of Russia which is.... confusing.

So anyways, I haven't really pinned down a consistent topic for me to discuss, but at the same time I think it would be good to consistently produce content. Aaaaaand my 1PM meeting just got cancelled so I'm off to the gym. I'd love to get some comments and/or feedback of some kind about what topics people would be interested in my covering.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Tabletop Game

I'm thinking about putting up story-converted versions of my tabletop game I've gotten started. It's using the Anima: Beyond Fantasy system and setting, and the system tends give everything a very Anime sort of feel. My thought is that the feel of these stories should capture that feel. If they don't... well that probably means I need to change my running style to capture that essence.

Would anyone like to see this?
Is anyone reading this?
Hello....?

Politics are depressing

I've been following a political blog for over two years now. I've read post after post of the hypocrisy of the political parties, the politicians, the local government, law enforcement, and others. I've recently become more acutely aware of my own anxiety and what triggers it. What I have begun to notice is that reading about all these people doing such terrible things has become a serious trigger for my anxiety. I thought about why these things would cause me distress, and I've realized that seeing all of this in one massive digest is destroying my faith in humanity.

I've never really been called an optimist but I like to believe that people are generally good and are not actively seeking to make everyone's lives worse. I accept that some people don't reach these expectations but that they are not the majority. Reading about all the corruption, bigotry, racism, and worse occurring in Politics right now just crushes my spirit. That truly public figures and events that are matters of public record can drive people to support such atrocities defies my every scrap of reason. So after careful consideration, I've decided that it's time to unsubscribe. Part of me feels guilty about choosing to be willfully ignorant of my primary source of political news, but I can keep track through other mediums when I feel like it, so this seems like the right decision.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Communication

Communication: It is the most important thing in our lives, whether its work, home, relationships, gaming, or any team endeavor. We all rely on the ability to communicate with each other in order to succeed in what we are doing. You would think that being so critical, that we as a species would have dedicated multiple generations to perfecting it.

We haven't.

Not even close, not in any culture.

It leads me to wonder why, is it language? Or is it the medium of the spoken word that is just wholly inadequate for conveying true meaning? I just today wanted to send a simple email, that composed in my mind would have needed a sentence, maybe two to adequately convey my meaning. Instead it turned into nearly two full paragraphs that rambled in all different directions and meandered more than a little.

In the geeky world there's often talk of telepathy being this insanely awesome power. I suspect that most don't consider it's uses beyond speaking without concern of distance or speech. I should wonder, though, would such a power allow for abstract concepts to be transmitted, and if so being able to harness such a means of communication could actually lead to the next great breakthroughs of mankind.

When a team of brilliant scientists didn't need to worry about terminology, perception, or language but could instead communicate their whole concepts with complete supporting contexts.

Imagine what raiding would be like if the leader could effortlessly convey the entire strategy complete with visuals and nuances of game-play that don't truly convert to words. It would be... Utopian, assuming that we were able to control who could or could not communicate to us directly.

This post didn't really go where I thought it would, which is funny since a post on communication struggled to communicate it's real point. I'd try to adjust but I feel like this post proves my point better than insightful commentary might.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Tempted to get back on the wagon

I admit I miss playing an MMO, and Star Wars: The Old Republic is looking really solid. I've seen a few posts by Anna over at Too Many Annas talking about developing her characters both on WoW and SWTOR and I admit that I'd definitely love RPing in a Star Wars setting, playing a Republic Trooper with a good heart but a tendency to get caught up in things way out of his depth.

This isn't really helping, sadly the reasons I have not yet picked it up are not plentiful but compelling:
Time - I just don't have the time to commit to an MMO these days.
Money - Without the time to commit I can't justify another $15/month, when I have a ton of games I don't have to pay monthly for to play.

Admittedly I've been hurting for a good RP fix, the Tabletop games I'm in these days are infrequent and often too short, and with no MMO to occupy my time I just don't get the opportunities I used to. Somewhere I need more time to do all the things I enjoy and I need to find away to make that time.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Bah Money

Never too late in life to realize that you don't know crap about handling money. I'm looking at the next few months and I sincerely fear that I can't do it. Right now things are okay but a major source of income will be gone and I'm not sure the expenses associated with that income source are going to balance out the loss.

Gotta tighten the belt I guess, cut unnecessary costs and possibly give up somethings I enjoy. Mostly take-out, dunkin donuts, and trips to the post-karate diner (well ordering food from there anyways). At least on the gaming front I'm pretty filled to capacity so entertainment should be in abundance.

Ugh, I've never been good at this, and seems like I'm getting worse at it not better. Guess the key is to not get complacent, just because I might do well this month doesn't mean that I'm all set....

I thought this post was going somewhere, but it's wandered around and never really hit on a point.

Here's a point: If you have money to spare, save it, or give it to me.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Blog Necromancy

I've been feeling the need to write lately, so I figured I have this blog that almost no one reads and it's as good a place as any to get some writing done. Little bit of blog necromancy.... does that me a blogomancer? Probably not, I think I'd reserve that sort of title for people who are fairly skilled bloggers. This is pretty much me just rambling because I want to take thoughts and put them into print.

Work's been rough, I've repeatedly been asked to do what conventional wisdom around the office believes cannot be done. Multiple times, that is multiple separate endeavors all of which were believed to be not doable. So far, I'm batting a solid average more out of determination than any great amount of skill. This is the truth about most truly challenging programming projects, and perhaps any project, you will inevitably encounter something that goes beyond your expertise, and possibly even the expertise of your colleagues. This will call upon a different skill, the ability to pull it all together. I've been routinely working with several of the office experts, none of which have attempted something of this complexity, but have done similar projects in the past.

At this stage my role as a coder is secondary to actually solving this challenge. My job is to ask the right questions, challenge the right answers, and piece together what the actual solution is to my problem. So far its been arduous and it hasn't really hit that downhill part where I cruise to the finish. Almost there though, just hope its in time.